Daily Archives: September 29, 2003

[Listening to: Out Of Nowhere – Gloria Estefan – Greatest Hits, Vol. 2 (03:44)]
2 days until the season premiere of Angel.

God, it has been awhile since I’ve gotten this interested in a TV. series. I hope this season is a good one.

[Listening to: Lil’ Jack Slade – Dixie Chicks – Home (02:24
Kiesha has left the room, and now I have my bed back to myself.

Anyway, took a stroll around the neighborhood. Went down to the beach where the view was beautiful. The moon is up in the sky in quarter, the starts are out in the sky, and in the distance, the fog plays on the surface of the ocean. I even saw the Big Dipper in the sky. Well, I think it was the Big Dipper; I seem to remember getting into an argument with Steve Madonna about this topic at one time. I thought that the sand would still have some heat, so I walked barefoot in the sand. I was wrong, but is felt good all the same. Only a few fires on the beach tonight, since this is a
school night. On the weekend, it is a completely different story, has the beach is just littered with bonfires. I tried to take a picture once, but it didn’t come out.

Headed up to the shopping center and to Starbucks, where I got my Vanilla Creme frap (which I am slowly
becoming addicted to.) Was reminded of several things, like I need to goto Payless and get another pair of shoes, since my Payless brand Sketchers sneakers are worn. Also could just another pair of work shoes. And then I need to fill out my Ross application and turn that in. Also need to get an application from
Radio shack and Cingular.

Anyway, I am home now. I should be cleaning my room and putting my clothes away. However, like Amy, I am feeling a slight creative burst, and I think that I am going to work on the site design. Got some ideas in my head and in my written journal that might be ready to come out.

[Listening to: Kick – INXS – Shine Like It Does: The Anthology (1979-1997) Disc 2 (03:15)]
So a pen leaked in the dryer and left spots all over the dryer. I guess the spots were deep enough because there was blue spots on Barbara’s sheets
when she went to dry then. So I got some Acetone to clean the spots; 15 min, later I am light headed and passed out on my bed.

Feeling a little better. Going to goto Starbucks and get a frappuchino. Kiesha (the cat) is laying on my bed.
However she just kinda blends in with all of the clothes that are on it.

Would have gotten a better image, but my batteries need to recharge

What is the purpose of life?

Yes this is going to be one of those kind of journal entries.

It seems that there are two points. or possibilities. Well, their might be more, but I am going to focus on two of them.

There is the one point that we are searching for a dream. That we are trying to work our way out of the harsh reality that is life to reach a point, or a goal, of where we are living in the dreams that we have. We play the lottery in hopes that we can win and live out our fantasies. We goto school in hopes of getting a career/job doing something that we really like. We loose weight in hopes that our Prince Charming will come on his white horse and sweep up away.

**total side trip. Talking with Angie at the balcony of the Cheesecake Factory that’s located at Union Square at the top of Macy’s. Anyway, across the street is Tiffany’s and one of Angie’s lottery fantasies is to march into the store just wearing some PJ’s and a bath robe and just start shopping. When the clerk comes up to escort her out, she just start pulling out wads of cash from her robe. Great fantasy**

Then there is the other coin, that we are living in The Matrix, just sleepwalking our way through life. Trapped in a dream, or I guess nightmare and we are looking for a way to break out of the haze we are in. Looking to be awake for the first time, or to awaken again to the person that we were before we got trapped in our life.

Not sure where I am in regards to these two theories. On the one hand, I have def. woken up from the dream that I was in, living within that moment of perfectness and happiness. That moment is gone and I have been jettison back into the waking world. On the other hand, the life that I am living now feels like I am just going through the motions. Day in and day out the same thing. I long to break out of the sleep that has taken over my body and mind. However, all of my attempts so far have failed.

So here I am, neither living in the world of my dreams nor being alive and awake in the world that I’m in. Question is where do I go from here.