Monthly Archives: August 2000

OOOHHHH. Cell Phones. I really do have cell phone envy
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God, how bad am I? I have no money, and I’m looking for stuff to buy. Right now I’m looking at Creative Labs FPS2000 speaker system; it’s only 109.75 at buy.com. I really want a 4 or 5 speaker set so that I can have surround sound when I watch my DVD’s. Screw the fact that I have so much other important shit to spend money on, like my overheating car for instance. **sigh**
Current mood: melancholy
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hmmmm….i just need to advert my eyes else where when it comes to local journals around here. That way, I can be somewhat oblivious when I get suckered punched. Hmmm, I wonder what’s going on in Chicago….
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GOD!!!! One day my curiosity will be the complete death of me. I had to peek at Suzanne’s journal. AARRRGGGHHH!!!! Thank god she cant read this, although when she finally finds this journal, I’m sure she’ll get pissed off.
I am doing self exploration on myself. Just because I am not sharing all of it on LJ or with HER, doesn’t mean I’m not doing it. I thought the self in self exploration meant “by ones self”. O.K. Venting over.
She is partly right though. I don’t think that I’m doing enough. I’ve discovered quite a bit about myself, but most of it just scares me. I’m not so sure that I want to find out more.
OK. I’m at work, so this isn’t a good time to do this. Maybe I’ll goto the library after work and post some major journal stuff.
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Well, I got half of the Sr. Prom pics scanned. Those brought back memories, some good and some bad. All of them had Jesse in them, cause he was popping his head into everything with his top hat he wore that night. Another example of how time, distance, and pride had broken a friendship. **Sigh**
Talked to Suzanne online…I tried to be good during the conversation that we had, but one barb did get by. But I don’t think that she caught it. I guess it was a good thing that Shawn needed the phone, so I could cut the conversation short.
Realize that April found this journal, and I’ve found one of her sites. It’s not like that I need to see her other journal; April and I have a pretty good understanding of each other (I like to think so anyway). So I can just read her regular journal and if anything is going on, I can usually sense it. Anyway, if it is serious enough, April knows that I’m here for her. And Vice Versa.
Like the whole Suzanne situation. I keep on making the mistake of reading her journal (damn, LJ is so addicting). But it’s like we are both walking a tightrope with our friendship. And the thing with her is; can she bottle up all of her emotions and subdue them like I’ve learned to? I don’t think so. I worry about the upcomming explosion and wonder how big is the blast going to be.
Actually, I should be thinking about going to work, since it is after 9 and I am still at home. Perhaps more thought at work if I get the chance.
Current mood: worried
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in other news, the tiger is on the hunt. I haven’t found Suzanne’s other journal, but I did find April’s journal, one of them anyway. I’m sure that they have tons of different jornals all over the place. I don’t know why I doing it. Something to do I guess
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I saw a butterfly at work today and had a flashback to my childhood in korea when I used to go out in the summer with my net and cage and go hunt for butterflies, dragonflies, and praying mantases. Those were simplier times. I don’t even see that many insects nowadays. When I settle down and have children, I want to live in a place where they can go out in the summer and hunt for butterflies and stuff just like I did
Current mood: thoughtful
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Oh man, my tummy hurts again. All I had was some cereal an now I’m in pain with LBM. Sometimes I’m lactose O.k. and sometimes I’m lactose not O.K. I would like to stay home, but I really need the money, so let me scrounge for some clothes and goto work.
Current mood: sick
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What to listen to…Oh, another gripe. I wish that the music indicator worked for other stuff instead of just winamp. I guess it would be too much to make it work for all CD players; and Wimamp is the most popular music program out there. I probably one of the few people that don’t have it. Anyways, I think Madonna – Something to Remember will be appropiate tonight….
I want you, the right way, but I want you to want me too….
Take a bow, the night is over, this masque is getting older….
This used to be my playground, this used to be my childhood dream…
You abandoned me, Love don’t live here anymore, just a vacancy, love don’t live here anymore…
I took your love for granted, thought luck was always on my side, I turned around to late, and you were gone...
Yes, this is def. what I want to listen to. I just wish that they had Bad Girl on this album. I really love that song, and it’s not on this or Immaculate Collection. I guess I’ll have to buy Erotica then. Ok, sleep time
Current mood: groggy
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I really got to fix the dictionary. I wonder if I can get it to use my word dic. it has all my slang stuff added into it already.
Speaking of Livejournal, I’m not really liking the mood icons. I wish they had some like stephanie (I think her LJ name is punquin) and somebody else (I think it is either ginamoog of lunar-something). Hmmm I could go and look for them, but I would have to pass Suzanne’s journal to get to them and I don’t think I want to read what she has. I will probably be safer that way. Ignorance/bliss and all that. I wonder how long it will take her to find this journal. I founded on of her journals before, but I stopped reading it after the first day. Seeing her so sad just make me sick, and there’s nothing I can do about it. I guess there’s not such thing has an easy break up. Anyway, I need to goto sleep.
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