Monthly Archives: January 2001

**sigh** Not that I mind, and not that I made a major change of address or anything, but I honestly did think that I would have a week. Oh well, I guess I do need someone to check in on me from time to time to make sure I’m doing O.K. Anyway, I’ll be up in Vacaville on the 12th to get my Office CD.
1690691
Current mood: impressed
Current music: Listening to Janet Jackson – Someday Is Tonight in my head

…and it was pefect. And we loved each other each time a new city celebrated the new year. And when it was finally our turn, when the new year reached us, I remembere being embarassed and proud as you leaned out your window and yelled to the world ‘I love Suzanne Larson.’ And I honestly though you did. And I honestly thought you would keep your promise. And I honestly thought we were where we belonged. Together. And I thought we would stay that way.
Current mood: calm
Current music: Phantom of the Opera – All I Ask of You

Think of me,
think of me fondly,
when we’ve said
goodbye.
Remember me
once in a while –
please promise me
you’ll try
When you find
that, once
again, you long
to take your heart back
and be free –
if you
ever find
a moment,
spare a thought
for me…
We never said
our love
was evergreen
or as unchanging
as the sea –
but if
you can still
remember,
stop and think
of me…
Think of all the things
we’ve shared and seen –
don’t think about the things
which might have been…
Think of me,
think of me waking,
silent and
resigned.
Imagine me,
trying too hard
to put you from my mind.
Recall those days
look back
on all those times,
think of the things
we’ll never do –
there will
never be
a day, when
I won’t think
of you…
We never said
our love
was evergreen
or as unchanging
as the sea –
but please
promise me,
that sometimes,
you will think
of me!
Current mood: tired
Current music: Watching La Femme Nikita on USA

I sometimes wish that I could be has cold has some of the characters are. But I have too much…passion? soul? respect for life? Something is there that keeps me from reaching that state.
Current mood: tired
Current music: Watching La Femme Nikita on USA

with Randy and Quetzal. Quetzal still can’t have a conversation with me; he only talks to randy, even if I’m in the room with him. Oh well, two weeks and then this nightmare is over. Anyway, watching the movie and a question was brought up in the movie. Basicly the line was that you only think about the stuff that you don’t have and the stuff that you want; what about thinking about the stuff that you already have. Something like that. So what do I have:
I have friends that care about me.
I have an ex-girlfriend that is crazy mad in love with me and sees things in me that I can’t.
I have parents that love me madly.
I have a car that still runs and gets good gas mileage.
I have a good job with a great boss and good coworkers where I can basicly make my own schedule and duties.
I have a place to live in
I have clothes to wear
I have food to eat.
I have a computer to use for my entertainment.
But none of these things mean anything to me. The the thing that I don’t have is happiness. And without that, there is no point to anything else.
Current mood: tired
Current music: New Edition – Can You Stand The Rain

EARTH
The element of sensuality and strength.
Has the earth moved for you recently? If your lover is a Taurean, a Virgo or a Capricorn, it ought to have done. These are the zodiac’s earth signs and they all have the ability to smolder and erupt, like a volcano.
You may not think this to look at them though. They usually pretend to be sensible, organized and efficient. Then, when the moment is right, they suddenly change. Think, for instance, of the businesswoman who takes off her glasses and lets down her hair… or the mild mannered reporter who turns out to wear underpants over a jump suit.
Earth sign people are masters (and mistresses) of disguise. They have to be because, if you and I knew what they were really thinking… we’d blush with embarrassment. Or, to put it another way, Earth sign people are very, very down to earth. Don’t waste their time with subtle suggestions. Don’t slowly try to get them in the mood. They are not open to persuasion or coercion. They are either ready for everything – or they are interested in nothing. And when the moment of enthusiasm arrives, they will let you in a clear, emphatic way.
They will reach out and touch you, softly stroke you and show you precisely what they have in mind. For these are the zodiac’s sensualists. They have enormous, hearty appetites which they like to fulfill slowly, course by course by course. In their own time. When they are ready. Without pressure. But with plenty of strong, unquestioning support from their partner.
So, is there nothing you can ever do to convince an Earth sign person that love is on the menu when they say they don’t feel hungry?
Hmmm. Maybe there is one thing. Offer them a massage. A proper, thorough chance to loosen the tension in their neck, shoulders and spine. Then… you can see what happens next.
FIXED
Here, just in case you want to make your dictionary a little bigger, are four new words for stubborn. “Taurus”, “Leo”, “Scorpio” and “Aquarius”.
These are what astrologers call the Fixed signs. All four of them have the capacity to dig in their heels and wait for what they want… no matter how long it takes. Their memories are as long as their hearts are passionate. They are, between them, the zodiac’s most unashamedly sexiest signs.
What? Even the Aquarians, who are allegedly just walking computers? Yup. Especially them. They may dwell in the realm of the mind but they think, a lot, about the pleasures of the body. And this is one area where thought alone most definitely does not satisfy them.
And as for the other three… well, I’m sorry but this space is too small to waste in a description of the obvious. Besides which, this is a website for all the family. One word is all we need bother with. And that word is ‘appetite’. As in voracious, relentless and insatiable.
You disagree? Well maybe that’s because you happen to know one who is currently on a fast. Sometimes, ravenous people get past the point of hunger. Once they do, they can abstain for ages. Especially if they happen to be born under one of the fixed, unyielding sign. Sooner or later though, the desire to get physical will resurface… with a vengeance. But in their time, not anyone else’s.
And here ends the first lesson about how to win the heart of one of these people. You give them time. Lots of it. Months if need be. Years if you really care. And you also give them that time if you want the relationship to last. You think of the long term. You make it abundantly clear that you mean business – and you prove it, by offering your trust. You don’t use words – for words are cheap, as every Taurean, Leo, Scorpio and Aquarian knows.
You don’t make dramatic gestures. Indeed, you keep drama to a minimum. For even if they appear to thrive on it, they secretly find it threatening. What they want is stability, plain and simple. For while some people consider continuity to be just a little boring, these deeply loyal people crave it like a drug. And rightly so, for they deserve it.
Current mood:
Current music:

Jonathan’s Astrological Love Computer
PART TWO
What turns you on?
EARTH WITH EARTH
There are some who say that this is the most unlikely love match in the zodiac. That’s what THEY think.
Actually, it is one of the easiest. The very reason why it comes in for criticism is the reason why it has so much to offer.
To show you what I mean I must ask you to think, for a moment about what your element is all about. When you here the word ‘earth’, what – other than a planet spinning round in space, do you think of; Mud and clay? Soil and rock? Field and mountain? Choose whichever image you like the most from this list. Now think further. What happens when you put any of these things together? Answer; nothing very much. They just peacefully coexist. And, over a long period of time, they have a gently beneficial influence on one another.
There’s no dynamic tension, no sudden drama, no argument, no competition, no challenge. This, claim the so called experts, is the problem. But then we have to ask, why do experts exist? To help us solve our problems, of course! No problems, no need for experts. And this, put simply, is a wonderful, ‘no problem’ relationship.
If peace and stability – and a total absence of crazy adventure, is all you seek, look no further.
Current mood:
Current music:

Jonathan’s Astrological Love Computer
PART ONE
YOU FIXED, YOUR PARTNER MUTABLE
You and your partner come from different planets.
That’s not necessarily a bad thing. There’s something rather wonderful about the way your loved one often transports you to another world.
There is though, a constant debate about which world is ‘home’. You see your world as the ‘real world”… yet you just can’t make your loved one live in it. You are sharing your life with someone who is forever away with the fairies. You’ve got yourself a butterfly – or a bird of paradise. Lovely and pleasing though this is, you find all that floating and fluttering infuriating. You want to say “come on, let’s be practical. Let’s think about the future.” Yet you are dealing with someone who makes everything up as they go along. Can’t plan, hates to wait. That’s quite a high price to pay for a sensational sex life.
So, you have a choice. Resign yourself to a life in which you are forever having to play the grown-up. Or loosen yourself up, a lot. It’s one of the two. What you can’t do is keep complaining about all that’s not quite right. Or rather, you can. But it’s not good for you. In a few days, when we take another look at our love computer, we’ll find out more about how to overcome this little problem.
Current mood:
Current music: Counting Crows – I Wish I Was A Girl

J – You can be very romantic, attached to the glamour of love. Having a partner is of paramount importance to you. You are free in your expression of love and are willing to take chances, try new sexual experiences and partners, provided it’s all in good taste. Brains turn you on. You must feel that your partner is intellectually stimulating, otherwise you will find it difficult to sustain the relationship. You require loving, cuddling, wining, and dining to know that you’re being appreciated.
Current mood:
Current music:

Your ego index was: 20
People think you are shy, nervous, and indecisive, someone who needs looking after, who always wants someone else to make the decisions and who doesn’t want to get involved with anyone or anything. They see you as a worrier who always sees problems that don’t exist. Some people think you’re boring. Only those who know you well know that you aren’t.
Current mood: tired
Current music: Counting Crows – Colorblind