Daily Archives: January 10, 2001

**sigh** Well, I picked myself up enough to finish packing. The only thing that is really left is the computer (of course). I can’t fing the box for the CPU, which is odd cause I don’t remember throwing it away. Lucky, I have a box that is big enough for it to fit. I’ll probably have like 15 boxes when I’m done. God, that’s alot of crap. That doesn’t include the couple of boxes that I already have at the warehouse. I think that it’s time to ship some stuff to Mom/Dad and to throw away other stuff. I hate to throw away stuff. The thing is that most of this stuff, I think that I need. These other guys are lucky cause their families live close by: Mike’s sister lives in the city, Randy’s folks are in Yuba City, and Quetzal family is down in Monterey. Meanwhile, my family is in Washington State. If they were still in Vacaville, I’m sure I would have less stuff to move. All of this stuff is practically my life. And it is as big as a mess has my life feels right now.
I will miss Randy and Mike; they were pretty good roommates. I starting to think that I should have stayed here with Randy and Mike and we could have looked for a place for the summer together. Oh well, maybe we will hook up yet. I hope for the best for both of them. I will see Mike since he works at the info desk on campus. Randy, on the other hand, I’m not sure about. Since he has graduated, the only way to see him is to go and join the YMCA. Which I have thought about doing. Quetzal, unfortuantely, I will probably see has he is moving into the Viliage too. But the last time I checked, he was to be in a different building than me. So maybe sighting of him will be far and inbetween. I can only hope.
Still so much to do. I have to change subscriptions and I need to get a change of address form and send emails to everybody saying that I’m moving. But I don’t even know the new address. maybe I’ll wait until after I move.
**side thought** I wish someone would have bought me something off of my wish list at amazon.com. Maybe for my birthday, I will hint really hard to everybody.
Anyway it’s 11:30 and I need to get things done before I goto sleep. So goodbye LJ, when next we meet, it will be on a T1 line. Heehee!!!
Current mood: calm
Current music: Seal – If I Could

Well, I decided to stay on-line a little longer and go random LJ hunting.
Foolish tygre, you should know better than to go wandering around. Look at what you found…
And now you are crying like a scared little girl…
Current mood: crying
Current music:

Well, I’m calmed down for now. Just gotta love the panic attacks that I get. Anyway, I got a new apt key made. My original got bent, so I borrowed Randy’s and got a copy made. The thing is that the key is too big to fit into the keyhole. I’m hoping that I can get away with turning it in.
We (Mew, Amanda, and I) decided to cancel the wedding. None of us felt comfortable driving up to Tahoe in the snow. So i’m still going to Sacramento tommorow night to see Mew. And then I’ll be back Sat. to move into The Viliage.
**sigh** I am so drained right now, but I have so much packing to do. I better get started on it then, I guess
Current mood: drained
Current music:

I am so ready to lose it. I just want to leave this place. I want to quit work, quit school, and just leave and run away from this place. I just want to run away from life. It scares me and I don’t think that I can handle it. That makes the only thing left is death, but would I really find the peace that I am looking for in death. I doubt it; I am forever cursed to be chased by the demons that hound me and snap at my heels has I try to run away from them.
Current mood:
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I am really not feeling well, I need something to eat except that I don’t have anything really to fix; not quick to fix anyway. I wonder if Mike would mind if I had some of his cereal. Anyway, it is raining so I know that the warehouse will be cold and dreary today. I honestly want to call in sick, but I can’t; some kind of feeling of guilt and responsibility getting in the way. Well, Quetzal was out all night and never showed up. Maybe he got some……naw. At any rate, I was able to get some sleep. But I still feel drained. **sigh**
Might have found a new guilty pleasure site: Soul Exchange. We’ll have to see if it can pull me away from Am I Hot Or Not.
Well, I need to get ready for work. I got a long day ahead of me.
Current mood:
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