I tried this already. When I first went out with her I did this. I knew I wasn’t ready to be in a relationship. That was the reason that I cut off contact with everybody when I moved to San Francisco, so that I could concentrate on school and to fix myself. But I could not get her out of my mind. That why I went back to her, because I thought that her love would be strong enough to help me find love for myself. And for awhile, I thought it was. But it was just an illusion that I cast over my eyes.
The darkness that is inside of me has such a hold over me. Can I ever get rid of it? Do I even want to get rid of it? Sometimes I think that I have carried this burden for so long, that it has become apart of me, never to let go…
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horangee
A 50-something pretending to live in California.
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