Not Enough…

I was on the internets, aimlessly wandering through the tubes as one does when they have nothing to do.  One rabbit hole led me to LiveJournal, a name that I haven’t thought about for a long, long, time.  My original account was purged; but all of the posts I’ve imported to this site anyway.  My secondary account is still live, which was interesting.  Look up other people to see who if any other accounts were still live.  Quite a few were still active, but they were some of the first uses and have grandfathered permanent accounts.  I think I had a chance to be permanent but didn’t pay for it.  Anyway, looked for Suzanne’s account and it was gone.  But I clicked on another account name and found one of her other accounts.  Mainly about her breakup with another boyfriend, but there was a line about me in one of the posts that I’m sure I’ve read before but hit different this time that I read it.  I wasn’t enough for her.  That’s been in my mind the last days that I wasn’t enough for her and that I’m probably not enough for Teressa either.  Hell, I don’t have enough for myself right now.  And if I don’t have enough for anybody or myself, then is there a point?

**sigh** I know where this is going, so I should stop.  I should do some adulting and clean something in the house or cook some food.  Still, I miss my friend and wish I could talk to her.