Should be in the Buffy journal, but it’s buried somewhere in my car with the rest of my stuff. Leaving in two days to try and rebuild a new life for myself. One where I will try to be happy and love myself. Where I have my friends to help and support me. One without my mother. The emotions are still there, but I have made a good start at dealing with them and putting them behind me. Mom being mom makes it that much easier.
I will miss some things and people here in Seattle for sure. But unlike Lisa, Monica, and Nick, I just can’t give myself to the Pacific Northwest. It’s a pale imitation to the Bay Area I left my heart in. Maybe it was just the time I moved up here, when race issues became a bigger deal. Although there is always race issues, so that’s not a really good excuse. Maybe it was because I saw how those issues could directly affect me. One of the effects of the Bay Area bubble is how it is so diverse that you forget how not diverse other parts of the country are until you leave it. Although that bubble has also popped with some of the events that have happened in the Bay.