Monthly Archives: April 2025

I look bad, but it’s actually good. Eye exam with the doctor and sight in the left eye is blurry instead of black nothingness. If exam next week goes well, I can go back to work for light duty.

But most importantly, I don’t have to keep my head down all the time or sleep on my stomach! Maybe I’ll finally get a good nights rest tonight.

Pics from what I’ve seen while keeping my head down around the house.

So into almost a week of the soap opera of my life and I’m doing OK. Divorced part is definitely laying in bed on my stomach at night. I get so bad and I’m all set laying in bed on my stomach and then during night I turn get ready to lay on my side and then remember that I need to be faced on all times. I’m getting back position always takes a long time.

It is interesting. How many positions affect the eye like if I’ve been down the wrong way it puzzle on my eye or if a sneeze a puzzle, my eye. Even doing a full stretch in bed, pulled my eye and gave me cause of alarm.

The most interesting experiment so far has been listening to severance on Apple plus while Gabby takes what’s going on for me. I’ve seen clips and ads for severance so I kind of know the faces of the people like the face of Mark to lead the show. And I’ve seen pictures of the sets so I know it’s sitting in the office cubicle. They have old computers, but it is interesting listening to Gabby listening to the show and listening to Gabby describe the scene in the show like I have my own vision of what’s going on. It’ll be interesting to actually watch a series with Phil and see what I got right in my imagination of what I didn’t.

Anyway, nothing too much is happening as obviously I have to keep my head down all the time. It looks like my disability went through a part of it anyway so at least I have some money coming in to pay the bills. Next check up is on Wednesday hopefully that goes well. I really just wanna get to. I’ll be able to stand up and look up phase of healing because looking down all the time face is really really boring and really, really sore from my bones. 

In some way, this is even a more force meditation than what I was doing before the accident. Before I was just on my yoga mat, meditating, trying to clear my thoughts and figure out the answers to the questions that I didn’t know what they were. Now laying on my stomach, not being able to watch anything or read anything so I’m definitely forced to go into my thoughts and try to figure things out. I don’t think my sinuses really aren’t helping me get into a meditative position or frame of mine. I really need to get the air purifier up here and hopefully the allergy medication will kick in soon. On a positive note I’ve been able to get the drops in my eyes without spilling all of it over my face so that’s a good thing. Waiting for Gabby to finish a meeting for before get some lunch. Looking at this with my one eye. I’m going to have to edit this a bit before posting

So day, one of my post eye surgery and I’m trying to figure out what to do with myself since I’m not supposed to watch TV or read or be on the computer or be on the phone stop. So I’m trying out dictation to see if I can dictate to myself a journal entry. Which is really weird because I’ve never really used dictation before because I usually mumble and so doesn’t actually going pretty good so far and as I said that it messed up some things so I’m just gonna leave it. Lots to get used to. Anyway, the eye is doing OK. I was able to put my drops in yeah I can’t think of that. I’m dictating. I can’t think of anything to say so. I think I will end this and we’ll see if I continue using dictation or not.

Surgery in a few hours. A long night of deep sleep, trying to sleep on my back, and keeping the depressive negative thoughts at bay. Watching the sun come up; wondering if I should have went to the beach and watched the sunset.

The thoughts are in full Hollywood mode in my head.

If nothing else, this has forced me to end this failed project of mine to be “self sufficient” and pull the alarm to get help. Hoping after this I’ll be able to see clearly with my eyes and my mind.

**update** detached retina. That’s probably a bad thing but feeling oddly nonchalant about it right now.