betrayal

I had a dream last night with Sephora and someone else. I wish that I would have written an entry about it this morning. Now I realize what the dream was (partly) about: betrayal. I know realize that this has been the theme for me this whole year. FYI since I work at a college bookstore, I still measure the year starting in late August and ending at the end of May. This whole year has been nothing but coworkers that I thought that I could trust betraying me in some way. And has insane as I am or could be, I think that I am sane enough to realize that I might have betrayed others and myself. I have def. betrayed myself. But we are not talking about my betrayals, we are talking about me being betrayed. Well no more. The problem is that I’ve tried to be a benevolent dictator manager. Maybe not a dictator. But I have tried putting the welfare of my employees first, thinking that if I show loyalty to them, they would show it to me. And what I have to show for it is being stabbed in the back, front, and sides. I need to figure out a new way of doing things and getting things done.