Monthly Archives: July 2003

.hunger

Have gone back to trying to force myself into surviving on 1-2 meals a day.

Mom would not be happy with me.

Anyway, did not go to the gym, yet again, even though I had to goto the store today and I also stopped by the old place to see if the ticket from the Golden Gate Bridge had come in. (I am just going to have to drive out there to pay the stupid thing.) Anyway, talked to Mike’s new roommate again and I told her that I was living in Pacifica:

Her: “Isn’t it foggy out there.”
Me: “No, I live in the sunny part of town. The fog stops right before my house. And I’m 3 blocks away from the beach”
Her: “Oh. **wishful sigh** I am so tired of the fog here.”

**sigh** Six Flags really cost me. I should have tried to get the boss to pay for the tickets also, but I really wanted to pay for them. Anyway, I will be able to survive until next week. Time to bust out the emergency Spam and rice; I know some of you know what I’m talking about.

Anyway, I hunger for alot of thing; however for the moment, my peanut butter and jelly hunger is sated. For Now…

[Listening to: Bring It On – Seal – Seal [1994] (03:58)]

.O Mio Babbino Caro

I love this song.

It doesn’t hurt that Charlotte Church sings it also.

[Listening to: O Mio Babbino Caro – Charlotte Church – Charlotte Church (02:22)]

.homework

Decided to got home instead of staying at work. After having some dinner, I am feeling better than before (even if it is generic tuna helper. 😛 ) Anyway, brought home the work that I was going to do, so I’m going to finish it and finish reading Harry Potter. I’m hoping that the Coke I had to keep me away will wear off and that I will be able to goto sleep at an early time, like midnight or something.

[Listening to: Hero – Enrique Iglesias – Escape (04:24)]

.workout

working out has been moved up to Tuesday, since I got little sleep last night and forgot to bring my tee. sweats, and sneakers with me. Honestly think that the workout won’t happen until Wed. or Thurs. because I will forget again.
Pondering staying late or not. **yawn** I just want to go home and sleep. However, if I do that, I will just wake up and stay up late again. And Tim is off until Thurs. Hmmm so much for using a sick day. I still feel…not totally sick, but not 100%.
Anyway, I should get back to work.

.anniversary

Yes, only I am that _________ that I would know the date of the beginning of our breakup and call it an anniversary.
**Insert whatever I am in the blank**

.website

Still have a block when it comes to the site. While walking along the beach, one idea that popped up was to do some kind of water-based theme; mix in some pictures of the beach, surfer, and such. And while having a ocean/timeless theme would be interesting, it doesn’t seem like the right thing to do since I hate water. So back to the drawing board I guess.
I really don’t want to goto work tomorrow, however Tim is off, so I have to go. poop. Have to goto the gym tomorrow also. Or will I hide out at work until late, in order to come home and to hideout in my room. **sigh** Amber does have a point that I will never find anyone new if I don’t start going out. Except that I don’t want to find anyone new, I want what I had before. Hmmm, O.K. scratch that one too. What I want is to get to know the new person that the old person has become. I want an emotional attachment, preferably a romantic and loving one, but even to hate would be better than what I have now, wouldn’t it.
What I need is….what I need is to turn off the computer, finish the book that I’m reading, and goto sleep.

.Dating Astrology

Most natives of Taurus tend to enjoy gardening, and like to walk through national parks and other beautiful landscapes. Therefore, if you want to show someone a few snapshots of your vacation in Yellowstone, you’ll find Taurus a willing audience – within reason! Taureans are also interested in the arts, particularly music. If you can find a good rock band that both you and your new Taurus friend like, you can trade anecdotes and song preferences throughout the evening.

[Listening to: Back & Forth [Mr. Lee & R. Kelly’s Remix][*] – Aaliyah – Age Ain’t Nothing But a Number (03:47)]

.hot

My room is so hot, I wish that I could goto the beach…

Wait a minute, the beach is three blocks away…

I think that I am going to the beach.

Pictures of Six Flags:

Tim, Mark, and Peter

Just chillin with our beers...

Basicly I took pictures of girls asses for the guys...

I have to admit, that this one had an hypnotic thing going on with her ass...

Not all of the girls we followed were jail bait.  This one we followed from the beer stand around the park.  Twice.

.sickness

Still feeling quasi-sick; just can’t shake the blah feeling out of my stomach. Hoping/Praying that it will go away tomorrow. and that I will feel better by Monday.

Thinking about my diet; I eat way too many carbohydrates to ever go on the
Atkins plan. I hardly eat anything else but rice, bread, and pasta. Anyway, plan is to goto the Park Merced gym after work 3 times a week and work my way up. Until they catch on to my scheme and disable my card, that is.

New web site ideas are non-existent right now. There is a vague sense of what I want to do (or attempt to do), however it is still just an idea hovering in the back of my mind right now. Hoping that I can pull it out and onto paper sometime this week.

**sigh** Guess I should talk about the Giants game. I was in a mood that day anyway. I had to goto the store to take care of some things, and that took forever to do. Then I get to the warehouse and the guys were getting to me, even though they were working hard on a back to school order. Anyway, I wanted to just stay at the warehouse and work until game time, but Tim wouldn’t leave me alone. Well, I told him that I have paperwork to do; I should have just told him the truth that I wanted to be alone. Anyway, I was suppose to meet him at Peter’s house to get a ride to the game, but ended up going straight to the ballpark from work. Was going to call Peter’s but left my
cell phone at work. Anyway, bookstore people started gathering around 7pm and I tried to get into the spirit and all. However, I did not do a good acting job. Hilda was there with Karen and she knew something was up. However, it was Amber that unintentionally sent me over the edge. Don’t know how, but she knows that I’ve been hiding out at the warehouse (damn that mother
instant). So she’s semi hounding me about going out and finding someone new, which I try
unsuccessfully to change the topic. But it was when she asked Brian, my boss if he could set me up, that I mouthed to Peter to
rescue me. Went with Peter to the smoking area so he could smoke. Next thing I know, I’m walking around the ballpark and the next thing after that, I’m exiting the ballpark and in my car on the way back to Pacifica, stopping at a liquor store to get some Jack Daniels. Because you know, when you are feeling down, depressed, and suicidal, you got a friend in JD.

Anyway, the plan is to keep myself busy somehow for the rest of the month, with a combo of hiding at work, exercise, and other things to try and to keep my mind occupied. We’ll see how it goes…

[Listening to: Cold Day in July – Dixie Chicks – Fly (05:13)]

Friday Five for July 18th, 2003

1. When was the last time you cheated? Hmmm. That would have to be a couple of weeks ago when I went to GameFAQs to find a walkthrough for a level in Dark Forces II:Jedi Knight. I know, I feel so ashamed.

2. When was the last time you stole? Not necessarily stole, but I did borrow a pen from someone at the store and it never got back to them. I’m famous for that.

3. When was the last time you lied? Thursday night at the Giants game when I told Amber that I was getting something to drink with Peter. Ended up leaving the game in the 8th inning.

4. When was the last time you broke or vandalized another’s property? No idea.

5. When was the last time you hurt a loved one? Sometimes, I feel that I hurt them every day with just my existence.

[Listening to: Simon Sister – Dance House Children – Jesus (03:35)]