Finish reading the two Christian books that Lesa let me borrow. Actually, it was just kind of a forced read just in order to say that I read them. Which means that I need to read them again.
I got some things out of the two books, but not what I wanted to get. Not sure if it was what I needed to get either. I get the point that God sent Jesus to die on the cross to save us and to forgive our sins. And that everything in the Old Testament is superseded by whatever was written in the New Testament. And that Jews, Muslims, and even Catholics are going to hell.
Yeah, I got alot of rereading to do.
I guess it come down to is that I don’t have faith in God/Jesus (I’m still kinda confused on that whole issue too, but I’ll save that for later, I guess). Am I being too arrogant in the fact that I would like God/Jesus/Angel/cherub/Saint to talk to me in person, or send me a clear sign? Am I just too pigheaded/arrogant to hear them talk to me? I am quite willing to be struck by something, whether it is a lighting bolt, or a big white holy bible, in order to knock something into me.
I probably should goto a Bible Study somewhere; that might get some of my questions answered. But it was weird enough going to a church by myself.
Maybe I am just destined to goto hell? Maybe that’s what I need, a sign from the Devil confirming my spot in hell. At least I would know, right?
**sigh**
I need to take some Nyquil and goto sleep.
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