Daily Archives: January 22, 2003


Frank’s Depression
The boom-bust of a dotcommer’s identity

**sigh** Every day at work, I watch Tim goto the job sites and send out his applications and resumes and nothing comes up for him. And that just makes me hole up in my job even more. If it was anywhere else, my job would be a good job; but in the Bay Area, it is just getting by and just above the poverty line. It doesn’t help that I am stretched out financially either; thank god I got my credit cards paid off and stuff. I wonder sometimes what would have happened if I would have stuck with computers and programming. Where would I be now? How would I have handled the boom and the bust? Honestly, I think that I would be home in Seattle working at Baskin Robbins again. But the other side to that is that I’m trapped at the job I am at right now. I like the job, but I realize that I am pretty much at the highest point that I can get. More and more, I wish that I could hop off and get a new job somewhere else. Tim is serious about becoming an electrician and if I was financially better off, I probably be with him. But if I did that, I would have to take a pay cut which I just can’t afford to take right now. Really, it’s the car that did it; I really would be better off with the Metro right now. It was old and dying, but since I live right next to school and drive the company van to work, I could have saved lots of miles. **sigh** Well, hindsight is something, something, right?
What else? Need to start work on the website. I’ve bitched to DreamHost about the fact that they say they support FrontPage when they really don’t. They’ve said that they would give me a refund for my unused months and credit that I have with them. But I think that I am just going to make the best of it and stay with them. While the problems I have had with them have been frustrating, the customer service has been good, and I really can’t afford to move to a FrontPage host right now. Besides, I do realize how crappy FrontPage is; but it was SO EASY to make my site. I could be LAZY. I still haven’t found my Dreamweaver CD, so I can’t switch completely yet. I’ll still use FrontPage, but I’ll have to change stuff like the navigation and the photo album. The good news to this is that I can try again with the webcam and I can try to install Moveable Type, just in case I need to leave Blurty when all the RPG’s crash the servers.
I need to try and get some positively back. The weather and work and missing Suzanne is starting to bring me down. What I need to do is to get back into the gym. I’m still kinda sick, but I’m put it off for far too long. And the exercise should help with the mood.
Still wondering what is in the mysterious package. Either a game or a DVD, I think. **squeeze, squeeze**
O. K. codeine is fully kicking in. Need to fall asleep in my bed and not the computer chair.
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The reason that I hate my cell phone….

The whole point of getting the cell phone was so that I could use it instead of the regular phone and save some money.
Except that I get crap reception in this house. Probably cause of all the asbestos in the place (It was built in the 1950’s)
**sigh** That is the life of me.
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It’s that point in American

It’s that point in American Idol, when you’re watching and listening to some of these people sing…Then the words that they are singing and you realize the song that they are trying to sing…that’s when the Oh My God hits you.
On a completely side note, I am never moving or visiting Texas ever. During a commercial break, I switched over to PBS and they had a special on the trial for the three guy who dragged a black man to death in Jasper, Texas. OMG…”I’m not saying it was right for them to kill him, but…”
But what? I am NEVER going to Texas.
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I thought that getting a

I thought that getting a milk shake would help my mood.
So I went to Cold Stone Creamery and got an Amaretto /White Chocolate Shake with a Brownie and almonds mixed in.
Well the shake was good, but it still didn’t help my mood.
And the new Allyiah song, Missing You, is still playing in my head.
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